Monday, October 31

Quiller NaNoWriMo Tag

National Novel Writing Month starts tomorrow...and I'm far from prepared. Naturally, instead of working on rectifying that, I filmed the NaNoWriMo Tag, which was created by Kristina Horner.

Let me know if you are participating in NaNoWriMo. If you are, feel free to add "cinnamon.quill" to your writing buddy list. Happy writing!

Sunday, October 16

The Picture of Dorian Gray - Chapter One | Quiller Readings

On the occasion of Oscar Wilde's birthday, I read the first chapter of his novel, The Picture of Dorian Gray. I love the language of the book, its themes and its characters. I also love to read aloud. Is that very vain of me? I think it is rather vain.

Thursday, September 29

A Cynic's Guide to Audio Books

Ten Steps to Narrating and Producing a Top Notch Audio Book

1. Speak in a monotone voice. Text is open to interpretation. You do not want to disturb the listener’s experience by colouring the narrative with any inflections or emotions. You are the GPS of a story…guiding the reader…poorly…through a journey…of immense frustration.

2. Never check the pronunciation of words or names. Don’t ask the author, don’t ask google, don’t ask a linguist. It doesn’t matter if the character who is speaking should know how these words and names are pronounced, just guess and go with it. Your reader is probably so ignorant, they won’t notice.

3. Change a character’s accent throughout a book or series. If you read a character with a Scottish accent earlier, switch to an English dialect later on. It’s all British anyway.

4. For a white, male character, use an accent that is accurate to his nationality. For characters of other genders and ethnicities, fall back on caricatures and stereotypes.

5. If you are a female narrator, make sure that you make all teenage boys sound like cartoon characters. It’s all voice acting, right?

6. If you’re a male narrator, make sure that all women have super high pitched voices. ALL women’s voices are higher than ALL men’s voices.

7. Use sound effects to add to the atmosphere of the story. Make sure you play the same piece of music right before a significant event takes place in the book, so as to remove all possible suspense or surprise.

8. Never listen to your previous work. If you are continuing work on a series, the worst thing you can do is listen to an earlier title. Instead, throw continuity to the wind. Just try to recollect how each character’s voice sounded and make it up as you go. Let’s be honest, no one who listens to you narrate book three will have listened to you narrate book one.

9. It doesn’t matter if you have no acting abilities whatsoever, butcher the pace and tension of the story, or if every character sounds exactly the same. All you need to narrate audio books is a pleasant sounding voice.

10. When editing, make sure that you can hear the background noise, leave long unnecessary pauses that make the reader wonder if part of the story has been accidentally deleted, and ensure that your narration is loud in one part and then much softer in the next.

Now go forth and narrate audio books! Anyone can do it.


A Cynic

Monday, September 26

Quiller Author Scenario Tag

Many moons ago, I was given a quest by Alex from MagicInBooks to do the Author Scenario Tag, which was created by Kaysia from BooksKay. At long last, I have risen to the challenge!

Thursday, September 22

Hobbiton - The Shire | Literary Locations

On the occasion of Bilbo and Frodo's shared birthdays, I traveled to The Shire in Hobbiton to see what all the fuss was about. It was a beautiful place, with thriving tourism. The tour guides are a little rushy-rushy, but I learnt that you can make them blush and mumble when you point at something unrecognizable outside of a Hobbit hole and ask, "What is that phallic-shaped object?" All in all, it was a glorious outing and I highly recommend a visit to Hobbiton.